Freedom in Forgiveness: A Journey to Renewal

One of the most powerful God encounters I have ever had happened years ago when we were visiting my husband’s family. The night we arrived as I went to bed and slept, I had a dream. Since I often find dreams hard to remember, I awoke with a strong feeling that I needed to quickly grab a pen and write it all down. In the dream, God showed me that I had unforgiveness in my heart. I was shocked because honestly, I did not even know this! I was aware of some instances that had occurred and that I had some feelings about these situations, but I had not recognized it as unforgiveness in my heart. I had always thought of myself as a forgiving person. However, God began to show me that it wasn’t just unforgiveness against one person; there were actually 8 people that I had unforgiveness against! And if that wasn’t shocking enough, I felt He wanted me to go to each of them and ask for their forgiveness. As I thought about each person on the list, I was able to see where I did feel offended by each person…and yes, there absolutely was unforgiveness. “But Lord, they did this or they did that,” I said. I just felt His silence. It was obviously not about them. It was about me! Many of them would probably not have even known that I had unforgiveness against them. I know it is not always necessary or even best to go to the person, but in my case, I felt God impressing on me that I did need to go to each individual directly. My heart that started with defensiveness began to soften and feel sad about my offended response to these individuals. That was God…because I have not ever done well at changing my feelings and softening my hard heart. The thought of having to go to each of these individuals quite honestly brought fear and made me want to throw up, which also confirmed the fact that I had harbored unforgiveness in my heart. Guess who didn’t want me to forgive? The father of lies, the one who is behind fear, the enemy. I knew that I was going to need to obey, but I could not do this on my own. I needed God to help me. I also sensed that I needed to act and do it quickly. I don’t know about you, but when I hear from the Lord, I have learned I need to obey as quickly as I can. Otherwise, the enemy or even my flesh will try to talk me out of it! So, that morning I actually went to the first one, which was my mother-in-law, and let’s just say it didn’t seem to go well. Then I began to question myself. Did I really hear correctly from the Lord? However, God taught me then that I am not responsible for the other person’s reaction. The next morning, we decided to visit a newer church in their area, and would you believe that author, speaker, and writer John Bevere was there as a guest that morning speaking on nothing less than, yes, you guessed it, UNFORGIVENESS. His book was entitled, THE BAIT OF SATAN. It was as if God Himself was saying, ”Lest you think you did not hear accurately from me on this, I am sending a messenger to confirm it.” John spoke about another aspect of forgiveness that I had never really learned. That when we do not forgive, we are the ones left in the prison. Since I knew forgiveness is for sure taught in the scripture, there was such a specific dream and word from the Lord that I needed to forgive, and now it was even being confirmed in church, God really had my attention. I was listening. Again, I remember the sense of urgency in my obedience to going to each of these 8 people. I needed to obey and do it quickly. The next week was spent connecting with each of the 8 people. It was not at all easy. I battled fear in doing it. I battled doubts. What would this do to our relationship? What will this person think? Lord, they did this or that, how can I forgive them? It was by far one of the hardest things I have ever done. However, it was also one of the most powerful things I have ever done. I know it has brought me great freedom. I learned so many things from this powerful work God did in my life.

1.  RECOGNITION is the first step to healing and freedom.

If God had not shown me that I had unforgiveness, I would have never known it or been able to get free of it. When we hold unforgiveness in our hearts, we are the ones held in the prison, and often the offender has no idea!

2.  True healing and freedom come from confession and REPENTANCE.

Matthew 16: 14-15 says, “If you forgive men for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions.” Mark 11: 25-26 says, “And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone; so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your transgressions.” 2 John 1:9 “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” God’s promise to me is that IF I confess unforgiveness, THEN He will be able to forgive me. Think about the opposite of this. IF I do not confess unforgiveness, THEN God is not able to forgive me and cleanse me of this. Therefore, I am left in a prison. Forgiveness is actually for ME! When we harbor and hold on to unforgiveness in our hearts, we give the devil an open door. (Ephesians 4:26-27, 1 Peter 5:8-9, Genesis 4:6-7, 2 Corinthians 2:10-11) The Bible even talks about how we can be turned over to the tormentors (the demonic) when we do not forgive. (Matthew 18:34-35, 1 Samuel 16:14-16). Since Jesus has freely forgiven me of all my sins and I walk in HIS amazing gift of GRACE, I cannot do anything less than forgive others. I am commanded to forgive. I know that I struggled with unforgiveness because I never really got GRACE. Raised in a legalistic church and being taught that doing right was being righteous, I did not really see my own sin. When I didn’t really understand how lost I was, and I believed the lie that I was in some way made righteous from my own works, I was more easily able to hold on to unforgiveness. When I truly realized how lost I was, and I recognized that Jesus died for me and my sin, then I was better able to forgive others. Once I recognized that anything I could possibly think was righteous was just “filthy rags” and that I had no way to salvation except by the gift of my Savior, was I able to understand GRACE and how much in need of it I was. Isn’t it interesting that those who have been forgiven the most seem to be the most able to extend GRACE to others. This understanding of GRACE is key to forgiving. Of course, on my own I cannot forgive. Without the power of the HOLY SPIRIT, I am unable to forgive in my human strength. What helps me is to recognize that forgiveness is actually a SURRENDER on my part. It’s giving up my right to hold another person in a prison of judgment and releasing them to God for His judgment. And that leads us to number 3.

3.  I will reap what I sow, and I must RELEASE FORGIVENESS to others.

The Bible warns us that we will reap whatever we sow. Galatians 6:7-9 says, “Do not be deceived: God cannot be mocked. A man reaps what he sows. The one who sows to please his sinful nature, from that nature will reap destruction; the one who sows to please the Spirit, from the Spirit will reap eternal life. Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” If I sow anger, bitterness, and judgment, that is what I will receive! WOW! If that isn’t some motivation, what is? It’s not maybe; it says I WILL RECEIVE THE SAME THING I SOW! Luke 6:37 says, “Do not judge and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive and you will be forgiven.” Judging here means to condemn. God, who is perfect, is the only one who can judge accurately. If I put myself in the position of God and I judge others…guess what? I will reap the very same thing that I am judging them for.

4.  RECKON as dead on the cross.

Once we recognize our sin, confess and repent, and release forgiveness, we now take this sin to the cross and reckon it as dead. Romans 6:11 says, “Likewise, reckon ye also yourselves to be dead indeed unto sin, but alive unto God through Jesus Christ our Lord.” Something that is reckoned is simply meant to be so, or it is a fact. So, something reckoned as dead is dead, and that’s a fact. Your sin has been put to death on the cross. It is in the past and no longer has any claim to who you are now in Christ.

5. RESURRECT new life.

Last, we want to resurrect new life through the resurrection power of Jesus Christ. The word says in Ephesians 1:18-20 “I pray that…you may know…His incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength He exerted when He raised Christ from the dead and seated Him at His right hand in the heavenly realms.” We have this same power living on the inside of us. The good news is not only that we have death to our sin on the cross, but we have been given Dunamis, Holy Spirit, resurrection power to bring newness of life. This is the same power used to raise Jesus from the dead.

Hallelujah!  Thank you JESUS!